The Doctors' Baby Miracle Page 13

  This time it was Kady who whispered. “Fifty-nine minutes until the witching hour. And, yes, I brought a dress. A slinky red one, as a matter of fact.”

  He didn’t want to know what had possessed her to pack something sexy. Had she been planning to go to a club and meet men? When a frisson of what he knew to be jealousy crawled through his gut, he pushed it away with a shake of his head. What did it matter, as long as she used that dress on him?

  “Ugh.” He swung out of the bed with a muttered curse. “I guess it really is time to get moving. Do you want the shower first?”

  “No, you go ahead. I need to dig some clothes out of my suitcase.”

  “I don’t like you in clothes.”

  She laughed again. “Wasn’t it you who said the hospital might frown if I showed up for rounds in a bikini? Or, worse, naked? I think they would be equally upset if we were pulled over for a traffic stop, and they saw I was sitting there without a stitch of clothing on.”

  “It might get us out of a ticket.” But that thin thread of jealousy was rearing its ugly head again. On second thoughts, he wanted her in clothes whenever they were outside the bedroom.

  “How about if you were out of a job afterward, if the hospital caught wind of it? I know how much you like to eat.”

  “I love to eat.” He said it with a wicked lift of his brows that had her out of bed in a flash.

  “Later. Right now, you need to go get your shower, so we can both eat.” Before he had a chance to think of a rejoinder, she added, “At that restaurant you mentioned.”

  He scooped his clothes off the floor. Damn, he didn’t have any clean clothes here in her hotel room. It didn’t matter. They’d have to swing by his apartment anyway, so he could put a suit on. Danali’s was fancy enough to have a strict dress code. He went there about once a week, mostly for business meetings, but something made him want to show it off to Kady. Or maybe it was just that he wanted to show her off.

  He got in the shower and lathered up quickly. Those tight cords he’d housed in his chest for the last three years were cut in two by a burst of true happiness. She hadn’t acted weird or stilted or awkward or any of those things that could have occurred once she’d woken up. They had played and laughed and made love just like they used to.

  Could they make this work? For real this time?

  He was dried and dressed in ten minutes, brushing his teeth with the complimentary toothbrush in a plastic wrapper he found propped in a cup. Another toothbrush was nearby, this one not covered by plastic. He dropped his in next to hers.

  Looked good. Right.

  As did the thought of sleeping in her bed every night.

  Something pinged in the back of his head. Nope, not going to think about it. Not right now. Whatever happened when her time in New York ended, he could at least enjoy being with her right now.

  He would worry about tomorrow...

  Tomorrow.

  * * *

  Tucker looked gorgeous in his black suit. With his dark hair slicked back from his broad forehead and freshly shaven, he had taken all of ten minutes to get ready. Even so, they had barely made the eight-thirty cutoff. But it probably wouldn’t have mattered. The waitstaff knew him and seated them immediately.

  How often did he come here anyway? And who did he come with? Probably not a colleague slash lover. At least, not if he was smart.

  She’d learned the hard way that interhospital relationships were not a good idea. Another doctor had asked her out on a date soon after her and Tucker’s divorce. She’d turned him down in the nicest way possible, but the man had kept coming back for more over the next several weeks. She’d finally had to tell him point blank that she wasn’t interested. And then it had started. The harassing phone calls. Going to her patients and making little digs about her with thinly veiled hints that she was incompetent.

  It had taken a patient complaint to make him lose privileges at the hospital. But it was something she hadn’t forgotten. Now she simply remained as aloof as possible with male colleagues. She was sure there was whispering about that behind her back as well, but at least it kept them away. It was difficult and went against her character. In hardening her heart, she had become almost like... Tucker.

  That made her smile. Because Tucker was not acting very Tucker-like right now. He was anything but aloof, his glances holding a smoldering promise that said there might be more of this afternoon headed her way tonight. And that was fine with her.

  She fluffed her napkin on her lap and accepted the menu the waiter handed her. “Thank you.”

  She tried to study the choices, but the words blurred until they were undecipherable.

  How long could they keep this up?

  She swallowed. Not very long. She was scheduled to fly out of New York tomorrow afternoon.

  She didn’t want to go. A complete turnaround from that first day, when she hadn’t wanted to stay.

  “Do you see anything that interests you?”

  She glanced up. Yes, she did. And it was sitting across the table from her. But there was no way she was going to say that. “Do you have any suggestions? It seems you come here quite often.”

  “I do. But only for business reasons. Meetings with hospital bigwigs or sponsors.” He reached over and took her hand. “I’m glad I’m not the only one.”

  “I’m sorry?”

  “I was worried about your reasons for packing that dress.”

  She glanced down. The red silk creation, with its spaghetti straps and curve-hugging fabric had been a last-minute addition to her luggage. She’d somehow thought she might have time to catch a show on Broadway. Little had she known that every spare second would end up being spent in the company of this man. But, oh, was she glad it had wound up that way.

  “I’d hoped to catch one of the musicals New York is famous for.”

  “Alone?”

  She blinked. “Of course. Who would I have gone with?”

  “No one.” He squeezed her hand. “I wish I’d known. I’d have taken you.”

  “You would?”

  The thought of actually sitting beside Tucker at a Broadway musical made her heart flutter. With nerves? With anticipation? She wasn’t sure what she felt right now. Forcing a cheery note into her voice, she said, “Next visit?”

  He paused and studied her. “Why does this visit have to end?”

  “I’m scheduled to fly out after our meeting with the students, for one thing.”

  She waited for him to respond, only to be disappointed when the waiter appeared to ask if they were ready to order. Kady gave Tucker a nod, hoping he would order for her. He knew what she liked.

  Yes, he did. In more ways than one.

  Maybe it was time for them to have a heart-to-heart talk and see what happened.

  And if he loved her? Did she dare hope? He’d certainly talked last night like he wanted a future with her. That wasn’t the only surprising thing. The talk about reversing his vasectomy had sent shockwaves through her system. She’d thought he was joking. Until he’d started naming any children he might father. Yes, the names had been outrageous. But at one time this topic of conversation would have been off limits. In fact, they wouldn’t have made it past the mention of babies.

  This was a whole new playing field, it would seem. But what did it mean?

  He’d hinted that some of his decisions after Grace’s death might have been impulsive. Did that include his vasectomy? Was that why he’d mentioned having it reversed?

  They’d talked more about Grace this week than almost ever before, but past experience still had her tiptoeing around the subject. Maybe it was time to test the waters again.

  As soon as the waiter poured their wine, she took a careful sip.

  “I think we should talk about things.”

  He nodded. “I have a few things I’d like to talk abo
ut as well.”

  That surprised her. But at least he seemed willing to open up and have an actual conversation. At least she hoped they both had the same topic on their minds.

  “Why don’t you go first?”

  There was a pause while Tucker repositioned his cutlery. Stalling. She could certainly understand that. None of this was easy—for either of them. Finally he glanced up at her.

  “I think I’d like you to reconsider going through with the in vitro procedure. And to reconsider going back to Atlanta.”

  “You want me to stay here? With you?”

  “Yes.”

  She swallowed hard. It couldn’t be this easy. Could it?

  Oh, God, what if it was? What if it really, truly was?

  Pulling up to the curb in that taxi and exiting in their evening dress had seemed like some kind of fairy tale. The twinkle lights at the front of the restaurant, the formal waitstaff, the quiet intimate atmosphere all contributed to that feeling. If Tucker had planned for this to be a new start, he couldn’t have chosen a better venue.

  This was the moment of truth. To bare her soul and see what happened. She paused to take another sip of her drink. A bigger one this time, needing a shot of courage. “So you were serious about all of that stuff you said last night?”

  “I was never more serious in my life.”

  She set her glass down, the breath catching in her lungs. “You’re actually willing to have the procedure reversed?”

  He looked at her, head cocking to the left, his warm and sexy expression gradually fading until careful neutrality was all that remained. “Reversed?”

  “Your vasectomy.”

  Neutral went to something a little darker. Was that fear around the edges of his pupils? Or just dismay? “I never said I was going to have it reversed.”

  “You did. I heard you.”

  “You mean when we were in bed?” He sat back in his chair. “It was a hypothetical situation. We were pretending. About a lot of things. Remember?”

  Pretending? Yes, they had been. But she’d thought there had been at least a modicum of truth buried beneath all that pretense. Like him being the one she chose.

  Hell, they’d made love as if nothing else had mattered. And he’d joked about falling back into bed tonight. Like they were on the cusp of a new beginning.

  As if nothing had happened in their past.

  Was that it?

  He was willing to pretend that none of those bitter times had ever happened.

  And what about Grace? Did he want to pretend she had never happened either?

  That was not an option. He might like games of make-believe, but there were some things she wasn’t willing to wave a magic wand at.

  And what about future children? Had she misunderstood those veiled hints. Maybe he hadn’t been talking about that at all.

  “What else were you pretending about, Tucker?” She lifted her chin. “Or did this week not mean anything besides sex?”

  “You know that’s not true. I asked you to stay in New York not five minutes ago.” A grain of irritation had appeared in his voice.

  “You also asked me to reconsider having the IVF treatment. Why, if you’re not going to have the vasectomy reversed?”

  There was a longer pause this time. So long that she could hear her heartbeat in her ears, hear the exact moment it began picking up speed.

  “I was seeing where things stood.”

  The pounding in her chest became a low roar. “Would it be a problem if I said I still wanted to go through with it?” Maybe he was just worried about the risks involved in getting things reversed. Even as she thought it, the rational side of her rejected that possibility.

  She didn’t want to be rational. Not about this. She wanted the fairy tale, dammit! She wasn’t quite willing to give up on it just yet. He wanted her to stay. Surely they could work something out?

  Then he touched her cheek. “Can you live without it, Kady?”

  All her hopes washed out in a split second, leaving behind an ugly, slippery stain.

  “Are you asking me to?”

  “I thought I could consider the possibility—”

  “Consider?”

  As in merely tolerating the idea? The last time they’d gone down this road, she’d begged and pleaded for him to change his mind. It had gotten her nowhere. And now he’d moved only as far as considering it?

  After all those words to the contrary earlier today?

  Like he’d said, they’d only been words. Just a whole lot of pretend. Had he thought it would make her even hotter for him?

  It had. Oh, Lord, it had.

  Her eyes watered, and her hands clenched the napkin in her lap. She willed the tears not to spill over.

  Never again. Not with this man. She would not fight this battle a second time.

  She might have acquiesced if there’d been any kind of actual give and take on the subject. But there hadn’t been.

  Raw anger clutched her innards, making it hard to speak. But she had to.

  “I’m sorry, Tucker, that’s not good enough.” Her clenched hands moved to the top of the table. “I’ll lay this out as plainly as I can, so there are no more misunderstandings. I am going through with the IVF treatments. With your blessing or without it.”

  If he was stunned, he didn’t show it. He simply nodded. “I thought that might be the case. I’m happy for you, of course.”

  Said as if she were an acquaintance who had shared a bit of good news with him. No “we” anywhere in there.

  God, how could she have been so stupid? This afternoon she’d been so sure he was reexamining their relationship the same way she was, hoping that maybe somewhere in their individual plans there was room for something more. Something lasting.

  If she was going to kill the dream, she was going to kill it completely.

  “So that means you’re not interested in children. Not ever.”

  His gaze held steady. Too steady. Robot Tucker had taken up residence again.

  “I think I made that pretty clear three years ago.”

  He had. And she was a fool to think that might have changed over the course of a week.

  With the tears still lingering in the background, she tried to think of some way to avoid going down opposite sides of the highway. She looked for some kind of intersection. A fork in the road. Anything that might mean their worlds might be able to meet in some way, shape or form. All she saw were two parallel lanes that stretched as far as the eye could see.

  There was no bridge. No crossroad. No body of water connecting the two, and there was a space in between that was impossible to leap across.

  How was she going to survive meeting with those students in the morning when all she wanted to do was get on a plane and run home?

  “You did. You made it crystal-clear.”

  And she was done. So very done. In more ways than one. With this trip. With this dinner. With this man.

  She stood to her feet, dropping her napkin onto the table in front of her.

  “I think this is where we part ways once again. I’m going back to Atlanta. Just like I planned.” Drawing in a deep breath, she was aware that people were beginning to glance her way, but she didn’t care. “And since you enjoy pretending so much, I’ll let you in on a little secret. Once I get home, I’m going to pretend that none of this ever happened. I bet I’ll even fool myself in the process. After all, I had the best teacher around.”

  With that, she turned and walked away, throwing the waiter a shaky smile as she passed him. When he made to say something, she held up her hand to stop him. “Unfortunately, I think Dr. Stephenson has decided to change his reservation at the last minute. He’s now officially a party of one.”

  CHAPTER ELEVEN

  SHE WAS GONE. And Tucker was sitting in his car alone
.

  He couldn’t believe she’d left without so much as a goodbye—although after the way she stormed out of the restaurant last night, he should have had a pretty good inkling of what was coming.

  He hadn’t gone after her, partly because he’d been stunned that she’d thought he’d been serious yesterday about the vasectomy thing.

  He hadn’t been, had he?

  It had started out as a hypothetical situation, but by the end even he’d had a hard time differentiating between fantasy and reality. So he couldn’t blame her for being confused.

  But to just walk away?

  He’d thought she would at least show up for their rounds with the medical students. A little voice had warned him that probably wasn’t going to happen.

  Even so, he and the students had waited for her for a good fifteen minutes before a niggle in the back of his mind told him to call the hotel. When they’d patched him through to her room the number had rung and rung and rung. And he didn’t have her damn cellphone number anymore, because the pool water had wiped everything in his cellphone clean. His phone wouldn’t even start up. And to go to the department head meant an awkward explanation as to why he wanted to call her.

  By that evening she’d checked out of the hotel and was gone. Because of him.

  He sat in his car, toying with his new replacement phone. All his contact information had been saved to the cloud—who knew?—so he had her number again. Unless she’d changed it.

  So why hadn’t he tried to call?

  Because deep in his heart he knew it wouldn’t change anything. It was about her wish to have children. The second he’d realized she was serious, he’d panicked, just like he had in the past. All his vows not to act rashly had been wiped away in the course of a single sentence.

  Can you live without it?

  He knew Kady well enough to know that it would take a force of nature to change her course.

  Maybe the correct question should have been, could he live with it?

  After they’d made love, the answer would have been...maybe. Until she’d mentioned the reversal, then when he shot that down, she’d said she was going through with the IVF.