The Billionaire's Christmas Wish Read online

  He was already putting the incident behind him. She could do the same.

  At least she hoped she could.

  And if she couldn’t?

  Okay, if she didn’t feel more like her old self in a few weeks, she could always resign and go back to the States. It wouldn’t look good on her résumé but, then again, she had never really had a stellar reputation in the human relations department. Her hospital would just think that her inability to be a team player had raised its ugly head again and gotten her thrown out.

  They’d take her back. Of that she had no doubt. She may have upset some of the staff at her old hospital, but they had kept her on despite it all. And that was obviously not the result of her sparkling personality.

  She smiled, feeling a little less wobbly inside. She would give it a couple of weeks and see where things stood. Then she would make her decision. This wasn’t a forever job.

  And it never would be.

  She’d known that from the beginning. Neither would Theo swoop in and declare his undying love for her. He was in love with Hope. And that would never change.

  The sooner she realized that, the better off she would be.

  * * *

  Madison poked her head into Ivy’s room. The girl was fast asleep. Two days after surgery and all was well. For Ivy and for her.

  Sensation in her legs was already returning, along with some tiny movements of her toes. All very promising signs.

  Her heart contracted at who else was in Ivy’s bed. Theo. Who’d spent every waking moment with his daughter, going with her to her first day of therapy this morning. She’d tried to give them as wide a berth as possible.

  Until she could no longer stand it and had to see them...no, not them. Ivy. She’d tried to find a time when Theo wasn’t with her, but that seemed to be never.

  So she crept over to the bed to check her vitals, hoping beyond hope that she didn’t wake Theo in the process. Well, if she did, she could just pretend it was a professional visit.

  It was. She would make it one, even if she knew in her heart of hearts that her reasons for being here were far from professional.

  Theo was on his back beside Ivy, one arm behind his head, his hand stretching to the opposite side of the bed as if keeping his daughter safe while she slept. His eyes were closed—ha! If they weren’t there was no way she would be standing here right now with a lump in her throat the size of Montana.

  She missed him. Missed sparring with him verbally. Missed their arguments.

  Missed strolling downtown under the Christmas lights.

  Most of all, she missed him holding her far into the night. Her eyes welled with tears, making it hard to see, but somehow she made her way over to Ivy’s side of the bed, smiling at how small she looked in that long bed, especially next to her daddy.

  She missed the little girl almost as much as she missed Ivy’s father.

  Firming her resolve, she slid closer so she could check her pulse and breathing.

  Suddenly Ivy’s eyelids flickered open, coming to focus on her.

  There was no time to hide or escape to the safety of the hallway. She’d been caught creeping around like a peeping Tom.

  “Mummy?”

  She was evidently still half-asleep, her small hand scrubbing over her eyes in a way that made her heart break. Soon Madison would fly away and never see Ivy or her father again. There was nothing she could do about that. But she could at least make sure the parting had some closure for the little girl.

  Unlike her own life, when her mother had been there one day and gone the next?

  Hadn’t that happened with Ivy’s mom, too?

  It was up to her to not add another trauma to the little girl’s life. Not that she’d made that big an impact on it.

  Ivy was still looking at her, and she realized she was waiting for an answer.

  She forced a smile, brushing a strand of dark hair from the girl’s cheek. “No. It’s just me, Madison. I’ve come to check on you.”

  “I wish you were.”

  “You wish I was what?”

  “I wish you were my mummy.”

  Madison’s breath stalled in her lungs, her hand going to her mouth in an effort to stop the words that were clamoring to get out.

  I wish I were, too.

  The pain was almost unbearable, slashing through her again and again until she was sure there was nothing left of her heart. Her lungs. Her vital organs.

  She would never get over this little girl. Or her father.

  Against her will, her gaze stole over to Theo.

  Open. Open! His eyes were open!

  And he’d heard every word they’d said, his brows forming an ominous frown that chilled her to the bone. Here was one person who didn’t wish she was Ivy’s mother.

  She had to get out of there. Now. Before he said something that brought her to her knees.

  “I—I... Sorry, I was just here to make sure she was okay.” She quickly said goodbye to Ivy and left the room. A second later, her back was against the wall and hot tears were splashing onto her cheeks.

  Who was she kidding? She thought she could see Theo for the next five months and act like nothing had ever happened? Act like she didn’t love the man or crave him with every fiber of her being?

  There was no way. And judging from the pain that still gashed and tore at her, those crazy emotions were not going away. They were only going to get worse.

  “Madison? Are you okay?”

  At first she thought Theo had followed her out, but it was a woman’s voice. She opened her eyes to find Naomi looking at her with concern.

  She reached up and scrubbed at the tears and pushed away from the wall. “I’m fine. Have you ever had one of those days where you’re so exhausted you could cry? Literally?”

  When Naomi gave a wary-looking nod, Madison chuckled, although it sounded more like the squawk of a pained seagull.

  “Well, that’s where I’m at. I was just getting ready to head home and sleep for at least eleven hours.”

  “Are you sure? I could drive you if you wanted.”

  Her friend’s kind words threatened to turn the waterworks back on, so she simply shook her head. “I’m good. I’d rather walk and get some fresh air. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the door to Ivy’s room begin to open.

  That was her cue to scram.

  Throwing an apologetic smile to Naomi, she hurried down the corridor and didn’t stop until she was in the safety of the elevator.

  It was then that she knew she wasn’t going back to her apartment. She was going to spend a couple of days in a hotel, during which time she was going to type up her resignation—effective immediately—and have it delivered to the hospital. Then she was going to pay someone to have her apartment vacated and cleaned out. But she was not going to set foot inside it or the hospital again.

  She was going home. As soon as she could arrange a plane ticket. Getting into a taxi, she asked where she could get a room for a decent price.

  When he named a nearby hotel, she asked him to take her there. By the time they arrived a few minutes later, her tears had dried up.

  No more crying. Hadn’t she learned from her childhood that tears changed nothing? All they did was make her throat ache and her head hurt. The only way she could alter her current situation was with common sense and a firm resolve not to look back.

  She took her wallet out and pulled out a few bills to hand the driver. Something fell onto the seat when she did. Picking it up, she saw the ticket to the carol service that Theo had given her a lifetime ago. She’d taken it out of the notebook a couple of days ago, thinking they might actually go together.

  That was a laugh.

  Handing the driver the money, she got out of the cab, still looking at the ticket. It was
in two days’ time. The last two weeks had been a whirlwind of activity, followed by a devastation unlike anything she had ever experienced.

  Well, she had at least two days until she could get a flight to the States, especially at this time of year. She might as well do some sightseeing while she was here. It might help ease the pain in her heart or at the very least it would fill her time and keep her from thinking about all she’d lost.

  Lost?

  She’d lost nothing except a thin layer of pride and maybe a little of her self-respect.

  Those would come back soon enough. At least she hoped they would. Until then, she would take in some sights and maybe listen to a few carols.

  You didn’t have to like Christmas to like music, right?

  She walked up to the hotel and asked for a room for a few days.

  “How many days?” the man at the front desk asked.

  Swallowing, she gave the only answer she could think of. “As many as it takes.”

  He didn’t ask her to pin down her dates, and she was actually shocked that they had a room. But maybe there’d been a last-minute cancellation. Why couldn’t she have gone somewhere like London for her working furlough?

  Because she’d been called in for Ivy.

  The man at the desk handed her a key and pointed to the elevator. Here she went again. It seemed like she was forever going up and down in the things.

  Kind of like her life.

  One minute she was soaring high, and the next she was sliding back to earth with a bump.

  Well, she was about to get off this particular carnival ride once and for all. And as soon as she got on that plane, she was going to put her time in Cambridge behind her and never look back.

  And that included a certain little girl and her devastatingly handsome and equally dangerous dad.

  * * *

  He’d hurt her. He’d known it the second she’d backed out of Ivy’s room two days ago. When he’d been able to finally untangle himself from the sheets on Ivy’s bed and rip open the door, he’d come face to face with Naomi, rather than Maddy.

  “Where is she?”

  Naomi didn’t ask who he meant, she just pointed down the corridor.

  By the time he got to the elevator, though, she was gone.

  He’d acted like an ass ever since the night at the hotel. He’d done his best to avoid her, rather than sitting down and talking about what had happened like an adult.

  And this was the result of it. He’d come in to find a resignation note sitting on his desk, delivered by a special courier service. The formal letter had no address on it, and when he’d checked at her apartment later that day, the manager said she’d already vacated the place. In two days’ time? How was that even possible?

  Maddy was a pretty determined woman. If she wanted something done, she would move heaven and earth to make sure it happened. Just look at Ivy’s miraculous recovery. Without the diagnostician’s stubborn resolve to find the cause of her condition, who knew if Ivy would be getting one good report after another, like she was now.

  Hell, he’d screwed things up so badly. And now there was no way to make it right.

  Checking on Ivy and fielding questions about Maddy’s whereabouts as best he could, he then headed over to her office. It hadn’t been cleared out, but then again there wasn’t much here that gave evidence that she’d once occupied this room. He touched a couple of file folders, smiling as he came across Ivy’s. All done now. As if she’d been an angel who’d come to help his daughter and had flitted away once her task was complete.

  Who knew. Maybe she had been sent there by some heavenly realm. Ridiculous. She was a woman. Flesh and blood. He’d seen that first hand.

  He went around the desk and opened one of the top drawers, frowning as a familiar notebook came into view. She’d left that here?

  Why wouldn’t she? She didn’t need it anymore, her resignation told him that much.

  He flipped the book open to the first page and stopped. His eyes slid over words that made no sense. What did this have to do with patients?

  This looked more like a... Like a Christmas list.

  We were just making some plans for Christmas.

  Wasn’t that what she’d said when he’d found her sitting on Ivy’s bed with this very notebook?

  Which would mean this list was Ivy’s.

  He re-read the words. His heart lurched to a stop and then took off way too fast, galloping in a way that left him short of breath. This was what Ivy wanted for Christmas?

  He sat down in the chair behind Maddy’s desk.

  No. It was no longer hers. She’d left without a word. Not to him. Not to Ivy.

  The list was heartbreakingly simple, with each entry followed by a short explanation as to why Ivy wanted it.

  Make Daddy love Christmas. Because he is too sad about Mummy.

  A new stethoscope—in purple, if Santa has one, because that’s Ivy’s favorite color.

  A book about horses so he’ll fall in love with them like she has.

  An adult coloring book. One of Ivy’s nurses talked about how every grown-up should have one.

  Macaroni and cheese. Evidently Theo’s favorite food. Santa must carry casseroles around in his toy sack.

  A puppy. Ha! Wouldn’t Theo love coming home to find a puppy under the tree?

  When had Maddy planned on showing him this list? Or had she just written it to placate Ivy? No, he couldn’t see her doing that. What he could see her doing was tracking down each of those items and sitting on Ivy’s bed while they wrapped them. Except maybe the puppy. And that devastating first item. He’d done his best to make Christmas special for Ivy and she’d seen right through his efforts. Damn.

  Well, he’d made a mistake in not talking to Maddy about what was happening between them. He wasn’t going to make a second mistake by tossing this book back in that drawer and acting like he’d never seen it. It was time he started living life honestly. Starting with his daughter.

  He went down to her room and found Judy inside. The housekeeper glanced up. Maybe she saw something in his face because she got up from the chair and came over to him, touching his arm. “I’ll give you two some time together. I need to go home anyway and do laundry.”

  Since Judy had only brought his laundry to him yesterday, he doubted that was the truth, but he appreciated her tactful way of sliding out of the room.

  Once they were alone, Theo went to the side of Ivy’s bed and sat on it before lying down with his head next to hers on the pillow. He got straight to the point. “I found this in Madison’s office.”

  He held up the little book.

  “She likes to take notes in that.”

  “Yes, she does.” He flipped through the pages. “She also writes other things down. Like Christmas lists.”

  “Mine?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then you know what I asked Santa for Christmas.” A note of wistfulness crept into her voice.

  “I do.”

  She blinked and looked up at him. “Does it have all of them in there?”

  “How many did you have?”

  “Not many.”

  “That’s funny. I couldn’t tell if this was a list of things for me or a list of things for you.”

  “It’s both, Daddy. I put things I thought we would both like.”

  Okay, well, the puppy was definitely all hers. And probably the book about horses too. But those other things...

  He screwed up his courage before asking the big question. “What makes you think I don’t like Christmas, baby?”

  She shrugged. “It’s when Mummy died. You get sad every year, even though you smile and act all happy and stuff.”

  “You could tell, huh?”

  “Yes.” She held his hand, her tiny fingers gripping his tight. “And I was think
ing about that. If Mummy’s in heaven, does that mean I can never have another one?”

  “Another what?”

  “Mummy. Because I know someone I would like.”

  His lungs tightened, threatening to suffocate him. “I know. I heard. But I don’t think that would be a very good idea.”

  “Why? Mummy would like her. And I think you like her too.”

  He did more than that. He loved her.

  Hell, why hadn’t he seen that sooner?

  Because he’d been too blind to see what had been staring him in the face.

  “I do like her, but there’s more to it than that. No one can ever take your mummy’s place.”

  “I think Santa has magic. He can make it happen.”

  “Did you tell Madison any of this?”

  “No.”

  She probably didn’t even remember telling Maddy she wished she were her mother.

  “Santa can’t always grant every wish.”

  “I wished he would make me better for Christmas and he did. I can almost pedal the bike in the playground.”

  She’d taken to referring to the physical therapy room as the playground because it was more fun than work.

  “Yes, he did. And I am very grateful for that.” That hadn’t been the work of Santa but the work of the woman he’d driven from his life with his guilt and his own foolish insecurities.

  “Well, I think he can make Madison want to be my mummy too. Do you want her to be?”

  “It doesn’t matter what I want.”

  “Yes, it does.” Ivy’s voice went up, her chest rising and falling in agitation. “You have to want it too, or the magic can’t happen.”

  He leaned over her and put a hand on her shoulder, shocked to find she was trembling. “I don’t know where Maddy is, Ivy.”

  “Just ask Santa. He knows. He can show you. I think she makes you happy and can make you like Christmas again.”